As I type out the title of this post, I admit that it should be titled “The Role of the Church in Ministry”. Some may say, “Wait…I thought the church is ministry”? Hmmmmm…is it?
I am being challenged on many levels by a class I am currently enrolled in at Phoenix Seminary entitled Marriage and Family Ministry. As I began the class, I saw it, ultimately, as 2-hours of elective credit…another hoop to jump through on the way to my much elusive and far distant MDiv.
But now, as God often does, he is surprising me with how much I am being impacted by the reading. And here is the central thought that is coming out of the reading: Why have we taken and/or allowed family to drop out of the ministry equation? Sometimes I feel as if I am being handed students and told to “fix them”! And I want to ask the parents, “What are you doing at home”? When a person visits a doctor, that doctor keeps a record of what treatments/prescriptions are made for that patient. If that patient is then sent to a specialist for this or that issue, the first thing the new office needs is the medical records from the primary doctor. It is a partnership. The specialist gives treatment based on what is being/has been done.
My argument is that the primary ministry needs to happen in the home! “What?”, you say! Isn’t that what we pay you for? Isn’t it the youth pastor’s job shepherd my child? Yes. Isn’t it his job to urge my student on towards righteousness? Yes. Isn’t his job to teach the truth of God’s word in hopes of instilling a love for Christ and his bride? Yes. Isn’t his job to relate to my student? Yes! This is my passion….this is what I love doing. The problem is when the meaning behind the questions are understood. Isn’t it the youth pastor’s job shepherd my child so I don’t have to? No. Isn’t it his job to urge my student on towards righteousness so I don’t need to? No. Isn’t his job to teach the truth of God’s word in hopes of instilling a love for Christ and his bride so we don’t have to? No. Isn’t his job to relate to my student because I can’t? No! Here’s a newsflash…you can relate to your kids, parents. In fact, you can relate in ways I can’t. The challenge is that you haven’t related to them on spiritual matters (i.e. inquiring about their devotion time, holding them accountable, praying with them, having family Bible study, etc) in so long, that now when you do ask (without explaining to them that you haven’t done a good job and want to change the way your family interacts), their kinda creeped out! And maybe it will take a while for the creepiness of parents who want to know how their children are doing spiritually to wear off, but I promise that it will be revolutionary in your family and the student ministry at your churches!
Now, it’s my turn to apologize. Parents, if you have fallen into this trap of depending on your church or youth pastor to handle the entirety of your students spiritual formation, it is partly do to the fact that we have allowed it! We have received that burden with open arms. We want to be the spiritual superman to your students! The truth is that we have become as the medical specialist…faced with daunting (and sometimes quite terrifying) issues in students without any knowledge of what prior treatments have been done…if any have!
This is not an attack on my church. I don’t feel like this attitude of spiritual babysitting is rampant at my church, but I do feel like it’s there in some degree. I want to see families that are having ministry in their homes…not because I want my job to be easier, but because I want my job to be effective. I do nothing on my own…the only way I am able to teach your children, to love your children, spend late nights counseling your children, to spend sleepless weekends smearing peanut butter on thier faces for marshmellow games…is because Christ has called me to serve the church, your students, and Him. That calling is not about entertainment. It’s not about wacky games. It’s about teaching your students with a shepherds heart.
I will end by asking you to meditate on Deuteronomy 6:4-7…pay special attention to the part that says, “And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise”…
Wow…a lot to think about….my mind is exploding over what this looks like in NCC Student Ministries…
Grace and Peace,
Zach
